HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY MAIN MAN

Happy Birthday Sam! I am so lucky to have you! I am sure that even with extensive searching, I may find someone who could grow a fuller beard, and I may find someone who gets MAN-icures, but I will never find someone who makes me laugh every day, and shares the housework, and shares the kid work, and never complains. No one else would put up with me like you do! And even though you make me watch stupid videos, and you won’t buy anything unless you can find a kick-*&%% deal, and you order our toothpaste through the mail, and you use my computer all the time because yours requires your own finger print identification system… what was I saying? Oh yeah, these are just ways you make my life exciting and spontaneous.

There’s no one else I’d rather travel the world with than you. You made Europe feel like home. If it weren’t for you being able to decipher the Eurail trail codes, we would have been lost forever. Despite being a homebody, you are amazingly adventurous.

Sure, you’d rather eat frozen meatballs than anything I cook. That just proves your incredible taste! And yes, you like to drink “Tab”, and you wear your older brother’s hand-me-downs. From his high school years. (striped Rugby shirts, anyone?) But I like a man who parties like it’s 1987!

As a dad, you are the ultimate. The boys look forward to your weekly donut runs. I don’t think they’ve ever had a vegetable that you have served, but there is definitely a place for a never-ending sugar supplier. Whenever I get mad at you for singing, Carter’s there to defend your right to shatter glass.

You are extremely loyal, as evidenced by sticking with me. You love all of the right sports teams. And as my husband, you are indispensable. You are constantly following me around, picking up my dirty clothes, and my empty diet coke cans. You order my very specific shampoo from E-Bay with only a few complaints. You never point out my weaknesses (except to tell me how incredibly impatient I am). Even when I am secretly trying to pick a fight, you are never duped. You’ll flat out say, “Bro, if you want to fight, just tell me.” Your calm manner always diffuses any hot situation.

And even though every road trip starts with us turning around after the first fifteen minutes because you're sure you've left the stove on/lights on/garage open/rugby shirt at home, I wouldn't have it any other way. You are absolutely unique, and I’m so happy you were born!

Love, your wife.