Dripping off fat thru sweat...

So, I am going for a drive with the boys a few weeks ago and guess what I found? OK, don't try and guess because you will never guess right--I found a Fat jiggling machine. Now, I don't know the real name of these machines but it is a machine that you put the band around your back and you stand on it and the machine just jiggles. Someone left this in front of their house...so I got out of the car, walked up to the door and rang the doorbell. I politely asked what they were going to do with this hidden treasure...when I found out that I could take it, I scooped it up and threw it in the back of the car realizing that my fitness and overall health was about to improve drastically.

You probably have seen pics of this but I decided to give it a try. It has to be a quality product--it is made by Sears! Since hooking it up, I have lost 27 pounds and I feel amazing. Ok, thats not the truth. In fact, the thing turns on but it doesn't jiggle, it just makes noises. I think it would be totally worth the few hundreds of dollars to get it fixed, while Brodi, for some crazy reason, doesn't believe it would help someone lose weight. Yeah, I know, she is a bit crazy (as you can see from the pic on the right, she is knocking this beautiful machine to the ground...don't worry, she didn't hurt it too much). If anyone is looking for a fabulous Fat jiggler from the 1950s made at Sears, let me know--I will swing you a great deal on it.

You paid what? For that?

I love Ping Pong. I play it like I play tennis. I take big swings with tennis strokes. I also make all of the appropriate grunting to be even more intimidating. We had an elders quorum ping pong tournament a few months ago and it brought out some laughs as people felt like we were playing on the tennis court.

We had a ping pong table in our house as well, so I would play 2-3 hours a week as well. I had a favorite little paddle that I used for basically all my life.

The point of this long, rather boring post on ping pong? I was doing a little research on a couple of tennis rackets and tennis shoes and I saw that I could also purchase a ping pong paddle. I thought that may be kind of fun to grab a paddle just in case I play again soon and I could use my own stick. I checked out the Stiga brand and guess what? One of those nice little paddles? $150. Yes, $150. Holy crap, are these platinum plated paddles (say that 5 times really fast)? Now, there were a bunch for $15-20...but they had more than 10 of those paddles that cost well over $100. And if you added up the three brand name ping pong paddles...you had a selection of around 50 different paddles to purchase from. Egads...

Give me some Candy!

I love treats. There are a few candies that I could eat until the cows come home. My teeth from my earlier days show just how much I loved candy (5 root canals with 5 totally street gold crowns...seriously, take a look inside my mouth, those crowns are probably worth more than my house). So, now I have brought to you all, my top 6 favorite candies:

1. Sweet and Sours: These are like tiny bits of heaven. Something sweet, something sour, something awesomely tasty. These are usually available in the larger candy bins at the grocery stores where you can buy bagful after bagful and they weight it out based on how many pounds. Lets just say that the total is usually impressive when I am buying.

2. Twix: Who ever had the genius idea of mixing tasty cookies with caramel and chocolate, was an absolute, well, genius. Bravo to them. Now, they have gotten creative with peanut butter Twix, etc...but the original is the best and will always be the best.

3. Mike and Ikes: My senior year of high school was spent grabbing my backpack and two big handfuls of these candies. I would put them on my lap as I drove my beautiful Toyota Tercel to school each morning. Nutritious and delicious.

4. Twizzlers/Red Vines: I like Twizzlers probably a bit more as they are usuall softer and denser, but man, those big tubs of Red Vines are truly evil. My mom used to buy those tubs and 50% of the time they would be fresh (you have no idea if they will be fresh or stale when you buy them) but if they are fresh and soft, I could honestly go thru about 45 of those in one sitting.

5. Bilar: These are a swedish candy. I had a companion, Ryan Lewis, and there was a little gas station right by our apartment. So every night as we were walking home, we would stop and grab us a big of bilar. Fabulous. Brodi and I discovered the wonderful world of global capitalism with IKEA as you can buy bag upon bag of bilar there. I actually think Brodi likes these candies more than I do.

6. KitKats--Who doesn't love these chocolate wafers. And they truly had one of the best little jingles ever and it was immortalized in the Office.

The Office at IGN.com

You know what time it is? Its HAMMERTIME!

Back in the day, MC Hammer knew how to bring it. He brought it dance-style! If you want to bring back those memories into your life once again, you can go to this site: click me For just a small bit of change, you can relax, lounge, or bust a Hammer move in the Hammer pants. How cool is that? To be able to own a piece of terrible fashion history...you can't put a price on that!





But if you decide against buying the pants, you can re-live the memories by either watching the following video or by trying to join their gang...which is basically a group of people who go around to businesses, on street corners and just break out the pants and start dancing to the bewilderment of everyone around them.



Go Hammer, Go! If you want to re-live the original, you can check out the real Hammer busting out all of his moves:

Wanted: As many friends as possible

The amazing thing about Carter is his ability to want to be best friends with anyone. It doesn't matter if you are a 2-year old at the park ("hey friend, come play with me) or a down syndrome girl at McDonalds that he had never met (cutest little girl, and Carter came up to her and grabbed her hand and said, 'Hey, do you want to ride this slide with me, come on, lets go"...and off they went up the stairs to the slide. They did this countless times over the course of 30 minutes) to our older awesome kid neighbors Zoe and Ezra and Josh in our neighborhood...Carter would ask any of them to come over to our house and play the wii or jump on the tramp every single day if I let him. He just makes friends. He just wants to play. Our neighborhood is terrific as he has a great friend next door in Zach, and 10 other kids in his grade in school so he is set with having friends to hang out with.

With all that said, it would be hard to beat his two best buddies (and both are his cousins) in Hope and Necie. Rarely a day passes by where Carter doesn't ask to see them. I will now have to convince my sister and sister-in-law to let me have Carter move in with their families 2-3 days a week so that he could be really happy.

New Fashion, BeckhamStyle

Beckham decided to bust out with a stylin' new look. He somehow managed to grab this hand towel and wrap it around his head. All I can figure out is that he just felt like needed a towel on his head to keep him cool during the upcoming hot summer months.

How important is that phone call?

Look what I found. A working payphone. Who wouldathunk it? For only .50 cents you can use this disease covered phone.

A wonderful, beautiful day of Healthy Eating

Today is one of the great special days of the year: National Doughnut Day. I don't think there is a National Lasagna Day...nor is there a National Sausage Egg McMuffin Day. But there is a donut national day and thats because donuts rock!

The Salvation Army created the holiday, which is always celebrated on the first Friday in June, in 1917 to boost the morale of troops fighting in WWI. According to holidayinsights.com, those doughnuts were fried in oil inside an American soldier's metal helmet.

I like to consider myself an expert. I have the pounds to prove it. There is Krispy Kreme, Dunkin Donuts and other great places. With that said, the best donut is a little shop in downtown Salt Lake City, Banbury Cross. If you haven't been there or if it has been a while, celebrate National Donut day next week--they won't mind.

Some random randomness

Summer is here and school is out. Carter is pumped to start 1st Grade next year...and he improved every term in kindergarten. Now, he gets to play with his friends, go swimming, play tennis, play his computer games and just run around for the next 3 months. He is very pleased. Beckham is happy because he gets to just follow Carter every he goes.

I had a tennis match on Wednesday night at Liberty Park (I won for all of those dying to know!). After the match, Brodi and I are walking to our car and a guy passes us. He was wearing one of those Hulk Hogan yellow shirts. So, kinda strange but different strokes for different folks. Anyway, he passes us and we both turn around and it really is one of those Hulk Hogan shirts with the pre-made tears in the back, so that a guy could just rip off his shirt whenever he needed to (click on the pic on the left to see it in its full glory). Brodi and I both looked at each other and grabbed our phones and silently chased after the guy to take a picture of the back of his shirt. We did not want to get too close because you don't mess with a guy wearing such an awesome kick arse shirt. The best part of it all? When he gets to his car, he drinks from his water bottle, tilts his head backward and spits/sprays/mists the water into the air with a full grunt. It was awesome! How cool is that? Now, I just need to find out where I can buy that shirt.

I think scouting can be a very good program for boys/young men. With that said, I never had much of an interest in scouting. I wanted to play sports and run around and it seemed that my scouting meetings were always about tying knots. Don't get me wrong though--I think scouting can be very valuable for kids. Anyway, the BSA just announced that overweight men cannot accompany scouts on hiking and camping trips unless they are within 30 minutes of a car--in case they need medical attention. So, the question is--do I make sure that I gain 50 pounds so that nobody is tempted to call me into scouting?